Saturday, May 9, 2009

The Motherhood Paradox

I just sent Robert and the boys off to one of Ethan's baseball games.

This is the first time Robert has taken Ethan to a game ever. And I made him take the kids too.

I've been doing this whole baseball game routine 2-3 times a week for 4 weeks. It's his turn.

I should feel euphoric. Finally, I'm free of baseball, if even for a few hours.

Instead I feel guilty.

And it's not like I'm sitting on my butt playing Facebook games or blog surfing. I'm doing stuff off his chores list and cleaning and doing laundry and preparing potato salad for tonight's inaugural lighting of the grill. I'm working hard and I'm working fast.

Still, I can't help but feel Robert got the short end of the stick. The 2 younger kids could have stayed here, but I made them go. I'm much more efficient with out them.

Why can't I enjoy this?


Erika said...

Don't feel guilty. Sometimes you just need a break. Especially with it being Mother's Day weekend, and especially since you've been doing so much running around with baseball. I think it's good for our husbands to have all the kids every once and awhile. Have a great Mother's day!

Mom's Fortress of Solitude said...

If I were you, I wouldn't feel guilty in the slightest bit!

I have a Robert, too. I'm always the one caring for and doing things with the kids. Running around doing all those errands we must all suffer through, toting all the kids along gets old really quick. We all need a break, now and then.

Just kick back, relax and enjoy what little time you actually have to yourself while he's out there walking a mile or two in your high heels. ;o)

Marah said...

I totally know what you mean: I would feel guilty, too. And for no good reason! Somehow we are going to figure a way out of the guilt.

Debbie said...

I talked about this on Sunday during my lesson! Why do mom's feel so guilty all the time!!!! Is that how Heavenly Father wants you to feel about yourself or is that one of Satan's tools...

I asked them who the most distinguished, royal person they knew was. (People said Lady Diana, the Queen of England). Then I told them the most distinguished person they knew was themselves! We are all Royal, princesses of God. Just as royal as Lady Diana or the Queen of England!

I showed the Mormon Ad of the "ugly duckling" looking in the mirror and seeing a swan. Then I asked them how God sees us? Then I told them they should try to look at themselves thru God's eyes, not seeing all their faults, seeing their potential!!! And STOP FEELING SO GUILTY all the time! Then we read a few quotes...etc etc...


Afton said...

Debbie, your lesson sounds like it was wonderful! I wish I could have been there, in more ways that one. (Do you still get thunder storms every afternoon?) I'm getting ready to send the all the boys and Robert off to the Father Son Campout this Friday and I've been looking forward to it all year, but again, I know there will be part of me that feels bad for Robert having to set up a tent and everything else with 3 little kids under foot. That doesn't mean I won't be pushing them out the door Friday afternoon.

claire said...

Don't worry Afton. The more you do it the less guilty you'll feel.