Friday, January 6, 2012

Here's What Crazy Looks Like (More Fun With Pinterest)

I have a pin board on Pinterest for stuff I will never do. Some of the stuff I admire and just know that I'll never do it. But some stuff is just so insanely crazy, I'd have to be out of my mind to attempt it. I keep those items on my pinboards just so I can know what crazy looks like--mostly so I can avoid the pitfalls of crazy. But  a small part is so I will be able to identify the crazy when it descends upon me.

Knowledge is power people.


Have you ever wanted to make your very own Goldfish crackers? Of course you haven't. Because you are not crazy. Because they are $2 a bag at the grocery store and any toddler worth their snot can chow down half a bag in two fistfulls. If you or someone you love makes their own Goldfish crackers from scratch, it's probably already too late.


These sheep cupcakes are darling, but might I point out that the mini marshmallows are CUT IN HALF. Do you see how many mini marshmallows are on each sheep. If it was one sheep, for just one person, I might let this pass. But as you can plainly see, there is a whole flock of half-cut mini marshmallow sheep!! I won't even get into other parts of these sheep's anatomy, like the head. (What is that? Marzipan?)


These are miniature letters from . . . wait for it . . . the tooth fairy. That's right. Not only does the tooth fairy wait until you've fallen asleep, sneak into your room, and trade you money for your disgusting tooth, she also will leave you a teeny, tiny letter on teeny, tiny stationary and put it in a teeny, tiny envelope with a teeny, tiny stamp and teeny, tiny wax seal. I'm certain our tooth fairy wouldn't even know how to write that small, let alone where to find a teeny, tiny stamp. (Teeny, tiny post office perhaps?) 

Our tooth fairy always hides the tooth money in my purse anyway. (At least she's consistent.)


Now this is the kind of crazy I can aspire to. Toilet paper origami, on the roll. I would love to do this at parties: ask to use the restroom and casually fold a rose into the TP before I finished up. Then again, this art form does imply that one had lots of time to just . . . sit around. If you catch my drift.


See this wall art? Cute, no? It's shoebox lids covered in fabric. I am all for thrifty decor, but I don't think I could live with myself if I knew I had shoebox lids on my wall, as art. Although, it would require me to buy some shoes to get the boxes. And one of those lids looks like it came from a boot box . . .


You know all those old sweaters you have hanging around that you don't want to wear anymore? No? Me either. Because I don't save old sweaters I don't want to wear anymore. I give them all to Goodwill. But you can still make these bracelets. Just go to Goodwill, buy back your old sweaters, bring them home and cut them up and--quick!--before they unravel, glue them onto cheap bracelets from the Dollar Tree. (p.s. you will never find bracelets at your Dollar Tree.)


What a lovely wreath made from toilet paper tubes. I have nothing else to add*.

If you've ever made homemade goldfish crackers or written teeny, tiny letters from the tooth fairy I just want to be clear. I don't think you're crazy. I simply think I, personally, would be crazy if I attempted any of those things. 

To be fair, you might find some of the things I do to be crazy. For example, I don't save things. Not shoe boxes or toilet paper tubes. And I've already established that I don't save old sweaters. I don't save much of anything. And to some people, that is really crazy.

So maybe I already am crazy.

Maybe. 

(But probably not. Have you seen the show Hoarders?)

*Crazy

13 comments:

Bekah said...

I also save as little as possible. Where would we keep it in our basementless homes here in Portland? (Kylene is the exceptionally lucky exception)!

Angela said...

Afton, I love you. You are hysterical. I am so glad we are related. Maybe my kids will get some of your clever jeans. (Unless you already handed them over to goodwill)

Afton said...

Ha! Angela, I can always buy them back.

Julie C. said...

So funny! Thanks!

Gayle wheeler said...

What, no putting the chicken on the motor and driving to your destination to have your chicken all cooked and ready for you. Such good use of time.

Natalie said...

I definitely "caught your drift". Maybe I should have my son start working on his toilet paper origami skills--he certainly has the "leisure time" for it. And the drift that goes along with it. Thanks for the laughs. :)

Senia said...

This is a high contender on the Favorite Blogs of All Time list!

Heather said...

This is a hilarious blog post, and I could not stop laughing (out of fear...?) :) Those goldfish crackers take the cake.

Sandy C. said...

Afton, how do you have so many fun ideas! Love them! :)

teresa said...

Oh Afton...you make me laugh so hard. p.s. - I have sadly graduated to addiction level on Pinterest

Azalea said...

HA! I love this! Great idea.

Photo Girl said...

This made me giggle. Thanks for the laugh. :)

Gwendolyn Warner said...

Your writing humor is spot-on. I, unfortunately or not, have saved a few toilet paper tubes. Not quite a hoarder, yet. And, I will use your adorable teeny tiny tooth fairy letter idea on my site, threecatscrafts.com. I am now a follower. Can't wait to check out more of your blogs.